Today was a long day. I've been up for 19 hours. Actually, that's a lie- I slept for 20 minutes during Italian, and for another twenty minutes about an hour ago- I suppose you could call this my third wind. As I sip some quality Bigelow peppermint tea on an otherwise empty stomach, anticipating future endeavors for tomorrow (Calc test, drive to Pittsburgh) and this weekend, I'm getting some pretty enlightening thoughts. Shall I share?
I find it interesting the amounts of themselves that certain people credit to certain parts. That doesn't make sense. Let me rephrase: depending on who you are, you find certain parts of yourself more responsible for your identity than others. For example, some may find themselves constantly concerned with their face. This means that the person has the false notion that the majority of their personality can be understood by others through their face. Some unfortunate people suffer from the depressing belief that our bodies say much more about us than they actually do. On the other end of the spectrum are the people who pay great attention to their language, or to their social circle, or to courtesy to other people. And then there are the lucky ones who can just go on living without worrying about how others are receiving them.
Here's the strange part- noone wants their body to be the number one thing that other people focus on, even those who are proud of their bodies. Noone wants to be judged on the people they hang out with, or the profanities they're comfortable utilizing, or the jeans they wear. Everyone secretly wants to not have to worry- so why do we? I find that I end up living so much better when I'm too caught up in what I'm doing to worry about how I'm perceived, or what kind of person I want to be.
If any of my classmates are confident that they have the secret to banishing those awful self-conscious moments from one's life completely, please share! Or don't share now- write a book and make it really good and become a millionaire. Does money judge?
First of all... Great post Julia! And kudos on having such little sleep. I would most definitely crash and burn.
ReplyDeleteI really like a lot of the ideas that you had in this entry. Every day I notice people commenting on how they wished they looked better or the way somebody else was dressed, and it bothers me. Nobody wants to be judged like that.
I am a person who tends to not care what other people think very much, and when I wake up and get ready in the morning I don't aim to make my appearance so it will please others. Like everybody, I have my good and my bad days appearance wise... but that doesn't change who I am and how people should judge me.
Some people peak in high school--physically, emotionally, psychologically, and unfortunately for some, intellectually. I guess that's great for them, especially in Senior Superlative Week But I saw so many people crash and burn when they hit college and after: I think Julia's post speaks to the urge to live only in the present and ignore the real timeline. So now I have reached an age that how people react when they see me can have NOTHING to do with who I am. Too many preconceptions, too many stereotypes. So I cheer for "being caught up in what I'm doing" instead of what others think about what you are doing, or how you look. Your own judgment will be the one that ultimately matters. Really.
ReplyDeleteLove this Julia! I completely agree with everything you said. It drives me crazy seeing girls putting on makeup during lunch and in the bathrooms between every class. I don't understand the people so concerned with others opinions because it really doesn't matter. Why people do this to themselves? It's a waste of time. I can't wait till about age 40 when no one cares or worries about others opinions. Its funny you wrote about this because I think about it all the time and was considering blogging about it.I love this though!
ReplyDeleteI must say this is an enlightening blog. Julia, you must have been extremely tired that day. I agree with Julia's observations of people with how we tend to focus on bodies. I also wonder why people focus so much on appearance and figures of others. It can be quite disturbing to hear what many people say. Maybe one day someone will be able to explain a way for everyone to avoid self-conscious thoughts and just live life to the fullest. Hopefully people will be able to focus on other aspects of their lives instead of what people may think of them. I feel better when my mind is too occupied to focus on how I look or what others may think of me. One day we may be able to overcome our person worries on appearance.
ReplyDeleteWow Julia, how you survived school that day I will never know, but you speak the truth in how people are always worried about what people will think about them. People are always worried about how they look or what they are wearing in order to impress people, be noticed, or to get someone to like them. This doesn't matter. If someone is judging another person on physical appearance alone, then they do not know what they are doing. Instead, I think that someone must be judged from what they have on the inside or what they contribute. This is how you can tell is someone is real or not, from what they have inside them and what they believe.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how much of what you have described can be attributed to St. Mark's culture, or high school in general? None of my kids went here, and they each went to different schools, so I know that every school has its own culture. Lindsay mentioned that she could not wait until she was 40 to stop worrying about this kind of stuff. Is this dependent on age, personality, or social?? Not sure myself
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